


Person

by Barenzo



Category: Bucky - Fandom, Bucky Barnes - Fandom, James Buchanan Barnes - Fandom, Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Winter Soldeir - Fandom
Genre: Angst, Bucky Angst, Bucky Banres Fluff, F/M, James Barnes Fluff, James Buchanan Barnes Fluff, James Bucky Barnes Fluff, Marvel - Freeform, bucky fluff, marvel fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-31
Updated: 2018-12-31
Packaged: 2019-10-01 00:52:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,443
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17234357
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Barenzo/pseuds/Barenzo
Summary: During a Movie night with the Team, The reader unknowingly make a comment that makes Bucky question his own Status as a person. Can you make him feel better about himself? (Request Prompt)





	Person

Movie night in the Avengers tower was always a blast. After Tony had the theater installed it was decided that every week, one teammate would get to choose what movie everyone would watch while the rest of the team pot lucked the snacks and drinks. They spent so much time fighting bad guys and carrying the many responsibilities of earth, it was often easy for them to forget that there was more to their lives than death and endless work. By taking time every week to sit and just enjoy each others company, it gave them a way to regain the calm aspect of their lives, give them a sense of peace and family, even if it was temporary.

This week, was Sam’s pick. The moment you found out it was his turn you could not help but give out an annoyed groan, because you knew exactly what he was going to choose. A couple days prior, as if by sheer coincidence you both were having a conversation about the many movies you had and had not seen over the years. You admitted that you had never been huge on cinematic features, you were a reader so the Hollywood movie business had pretty much evaded your attention. It wasn’t until you answered ‘nope, haven’t seen it’ to the terminator series did you become convinced that your friendship was failing.

It was not just you he was mad at, your person Bucky had not seen the movies either, putting you both in hot water with the flying bird. You ended up making a promise for you both ( despite Bucky’s steady protests ) that you would watch the movies when you could, and share your honest thoughts. 

“Okay, I’m not sure I understand the point of this. Arnold plays a human robot killing thingy who does what now?” You asked as you sat down next to Bucky. You were seated in the middle of the row, giving you a perfect center view of the screen. 

“Okay first of all Y/N, he is a cyborg. Assassin.” Sam explained, taking the seat to your right. “And you will see, I refuse to give away the plot.” 

“I could always look it up on Wikipedia.” You spoke through a snort. 

“Here is my phone.” Bucky smiled, taking the device out of his pocket. “Please spoil it.”

“Shut your mouth snowball soldier.” Sam teased throwing a glare in his direction. “If you so much as type anything in that search bar I will blast Taylor Swift every morning for a month.” 

“ _Jesus_ no. Please put it away Bucky, it’s not worth it.” You pleaded to him. Bucky looked down to you and smiled, shaking his head and shoving the phone back in his pocket. His flesh hand interlocked with your left, giving you a sense of comfort, and a warm feeling in your heart.

The relationship you had with Bucky was fairly new. You had only been going out for a few months and you knew he was still getting used to the idea of having someone other than Steve in his personal life. He made it clear that you both would be very slow, and to not take anything personal if he seemed nervous or off putting when he was around you. 

 You had some experience dealing with his introverted personality already, the moment you became acquainted with him he was extremely standoffish. Steve explained he was very unsure of you and the rest of team. Being in a new environment with so many strangers was going to be a very tough transition for him, so we had to give him his space, and let him come to you all when he was ready.

In the beginning, he was very uncommunicative. When he did chose to talk, it would come off as extremely hostile and very ill-mannered. You could tell that the team was not pleased by his behavior, but you held a different perspective. Maybe it was from your own troubled past that you could see through his hard exterior, or maybe it was because like Steve you wanted to always try to find the good in people, either way, you could see how much pain the man was in. He was afraid, he was haunted by the memories of the evil deeds he was forced to commit, he mind was forced to relive the many mistakes he wished he could undo. 

You brought it upon yourself to try and make a breakthrough with him. To make him see that, that part of his life was over and that he could start anew. He fought against your kindness for a long while. He hurled insults to you, you kept pushing. He got in your face, you kept comforting. He screamed and yelled the most hurtful things to get under your skin, and you let him. You allowed him to project what he felt toward you without taking offense, and without coddling. You knew it was something Bucky needed, he had internalized so much for so long you wanted to gift him the option of letting all out, letting him finally be free.

After months of forged insults in an attempt to push you away, Bucky broke down. He had come to your room one night after a nightmare, asking for your attention. He broke down, crying to you of the horror he sees when he looks at himself, the pain he feels waking up every morning knowing he cannot change the things that he has done. He looked so fragile, so broken, the way he looked into your eyes as the tears flooded down his face face broke your heart, you wished there was a way to undo it all, to give him the peace he craved. if anyone deserved a better life, a full and happy life, it was him. He stayed with you that night, sleeping in your bed, a comfortable space and silence between you both. 

He started to change after that. He apologized to the team for his behavior, what was once hostility, turned into playfulness. He built steady friendships with the team, even Tony had come to respect him, which whether he would ever admit it or not, really put part of his mind at ease. When it came to you, you noticed he was gentle, his eyes would look at you with such warmth and thankfulness. You noticed every time he would smile when you told him a story, or explained the things you liked. You noticed how alluring and addictive Bucky was, and how much you really began to care for him. 

You were fully aware of your feelings for him, but assumed he was in no way ready for that type of commitment. You did however, ask him to dinner. He was reluctant at first, but you explained that it was not a date, it was just a simple night out between friends. You wanted him to get out more, to try and find beauty in the outside world again, you figured the best way to start would be to get him comfortable in intimate situations between two people. You had the best time of your life that night. You learned a lot more about him, how he was back in his time, his favorite color, favorite books. You even got him to laugh his beautiful laugh, something you had not expected. The other thing you had not expected was the small kiss on the cheek he had given you before you departed from each other. 

He was the one that asked you to be his person. Not girlfriend per say, but person. He told you how he respected you so much, and how he appreciated the endless amount of support he had always received from you. You admitted how surprised you were that he wanted to take such a huge step with you, and he responded that he surprised himself, but if you would have him, he would love to take further steps forward, just with you at his side. 

The relationship had slowly built since then. The team was aware of your growing…thing, with Bucky, and they were very supportive of you both. You held hands every so often now, your hugs lingered longer each time, and as of last week you now slept together in the same bed, the same small space between you, but it kept getting smaller each passing day. 

“Which one is the swarstigijjer?” Bucky asked bending downward slightly to whisper in your ear. 

“It’s Schwarzenegger.” You corrected with a chuckle. “He is the one that’s trying to kill the one chick.” 

“Her name is Sara Connor and she is played by Linda Hamilton, learn your history!” Sam whispered with a playful glare. 

“Ya know Sam, I’m not really understanding the hype with this movie, if anything this just secures my hatred of robots.” 

Sam’s mouth opened in shock, seemingly hurt by your statement. You could feel Bucky’s hand tense in yours slightly, but you thought nothing of it. 

“You hate robots? What the hell for?” Sam asked, his attention no longer on the movie. 

“I mean..” You started with a whisper. “Hate is a strong word, but I do dislike them. They are so scary, like they can cause so much damage to so many things and people.” 

“So you hate Tony then?” Sam asked, making you roll your eyes. 

“No, asshole. Tony is a man in a robot body, and he would never hurt anybody.” 

You felt a snatch from your hand, causing you to turn toward Bucky in surprise. He was now standing up, his posture abnormally straight. It was too dark to read his face but even if you could you would have missed it as he quickly made his way out the theater

“Whats his deal?” You heard Clint ask from the end of your row. 

“Did I say something?” Sam asked in confusion

“I have no idea.” You spoke, your face full of worry. 

“Maybe he had to pee.” Tony shrugged.

“He sure left pretty fast.” You spoke again, your eyes not leaving the door.

“I can go talk to him.” Steve offered, getting up from his seat in front of you. 

“No.” You spoke, raising a hand to stop him. “I’ll go it’s fine.” 

“You sure?” He asked. 

“Yeah.” You got up and made your way out the theater doors, you feet quickly carrying you to find Bucky. 

You stepped down the hallway hurriedly, your breathing slightly becoming erratic as different scenarios popped in your mind. Did something in the movie trigger him? Did he get hurt somehow? You tried to quite your mind before you came up with something worse, something that would ultimate give you an anxiety attack out of pure worry. 

You felt your steps slow as you caught Bucky walking ahead of you, his pace quick and determined.

“Bucky? Bucky what's wrong?!” You called out to him. 

It was as if your voice had made him walk faster, like he was trying to get away from you.  You tried to pick up your pace to catch him, but his legs were much faster than yours, and by the time you got to his room, the silver door had slammed shut right in your face. 

You looked at the door for a moment, feeling sort of taken aback at his actions. You shook your head, brining yourself back to reality before opening the door and stepping inside his private sanctuary. 

He stood in the middle of his room, back to you and head slightly lowered. You could not see his arms so you figured they were crossed against his chest. You became slightly anxious, you were not sure how to approach the situation and you did not want to say anything that would make whatever was going on with him any worse. 

You licked your lips in nervousness and slowly approached him. The silence in the room was far from comfortable. You could hear the sound of your feet colliding with his carpet, and the closer you got, the lighter your steps became. you extended your right hand out to rest on his shoulder, maybe he just needed some encouragement. 

“Bucky what's-” 

You stopped yourself when he jerked his shoulder away and took a couple steps forward away from you. You inched your arm backward toward you, your hand closing in a small un-clenched fist before returning to your side. You were not going to try and pretend that it did not hurt your feelings, the drop in your chest made your emotions clear, but this was not about you, it was about him. 

“Bucky…”You whispered carefully. “What happened?”  

No answer. His back remained to you, and it was really starting to bother you. He had shut off from you like this may times before, but even in his worst moments he never made it seem like your touch was so toxic. Knowing you could not explain his sudden change of behavior was eating at you like a fire and you just wanted to turn him to face you, but it was clear he did not want any physical contact.

“Was it the movie?” You asked, trying anything decipher what went wrong.

“I can’t do this.” He finally answered, his voice flat, void of all emotion. 

“Can’t do what?” You asked him. 

He turned to you and met your eyes. You took in his perfect yet disturbed form and it only confused you more. His body read isolated and discomfort, but his eyes had such longing in them, as if he was waiting for you to do something. 

“This…me and you, Y/N, I can’t-” 

His words just hanged there, the sound waves echoing in your ear. Your heart was fighting for all it’s worth not to break, but It was painful. It was not like you had actually put a definitive name on what you two were, but this was so sudden and so random it only made you hurt worse. You understood his life, his pain, and you took his words of him needing space seriously, but you needed to know, what had you done to him?

“Okay.” You spoke simply with a nod. “That’s your choice, and I respect it, but Bucky, can you at least tell me what happened for you to come to this decision?” 

He got silent again and you knew he wanted to close off. You shook your head, not wiling to accept any more empty air you walked close to him, neither of you breaking eye contact. 

“Tell me what I did…please.” 

He looked at you with confusion, you assumed he had not expected you to plea for an answer. 

“It’s not you, it’s me.” He answered, making you step back from him with a raised brow. His response turned your curiosity into bitter anger. 

“Really?” You asked, your voice stern. “That’s what you’re going with?

His facial expression hanged, and he started to stumble as if he had to justify himself. “I-I know that line is overused in this time period but it is true….What you said to Sam was true, robots damage so many people If i ever hurt you-”

“Whoa whoa whoa hold on.” You interrupted. Your mind beating in slight disbelief. “ _That’s_ what this is all about?”

You eyed Bucky who just looked at you, his face etched with worry.

“Bucky…honey, you’re not a robot. You have a metal arm, there is huge difference.” 

“Is there? They hurt people, I have hurt people. My arm can destroy, so can they-”

“Stop.” You demanded, crossing your arms against your chest. An Idea popped in your head and you smiled while nodding down to his chest. “Take off your shirt.” 

“What?”

“Your shirt. Take it off.” You spoke again. 

“Y/N I don’t think-”

“Just trust me, okay?...Take it off.” 

You could see his reluctance and suspicion but he slowly complied to your request. You had to regain your composure as quickly as you could to avoid him realizing how the sight of his muscular frame had affected you. He was so well toned, you found a new appreciation for the massive amount of times he spent at the gym. You knew he was built, but you had never see him fully shirtless before. Even when you guys slept in the same bed he had always worn a wife beater, and when he worked out he never stripped his work out shirt. Now that you knew what he was hiding, you were quite upset he would hide something so delightful, and so delicious.

You made sure to make eye contact with him as you approached him. As much as you enjoyed looking at his body you wanted him to read your eyes and realize that there was a purpose for what you asked of him. You could see searching, and the close you cam to him the less tense he became. 

When the space between you was thin enough you kept your eyes locked and brought your hand to rest on his lower stomach. Slowly and gracefully you brought your hand up his abdomen, your hands grazing over his perfectly shaped abs. Your palm grazed over his left nipple as you ascended up his body and you felt his body tense, but you kept going. You finally landed at your desired destination all the way up to his left shoulder right where metal met skin. 

“This is not a weapon.” you stated, still refusing to break eye contact. “You only see it that way because of what you have been through. When I said I did not like robots, I meant machines. You are not a machine, you never were and you never will be. You are an amazing, beautiful, considerate, loving, fully functional _human_ being. And, for the record, I really love the arm.” 

You smiled warmly at him, not removing your hand from its position. By the way he looked at you, you knew he took your words to heart and knew you were telling the truth. The smile you came to adore grew on his face, his shoulders were calm, his body was now relaxed, you could see the light return to his face and it soothed you. You felt his metal arm raise and cup your cheek, the eye contact still strong. 

You watched him lean in, the gesture was welcomed but you could feel your nervousness as you knew what was about to happen. This was not a kiss on the cheek, it was not a kiss on the forehead, he was moving toward your lips. It was an action you had not believed he would be ready for, for some time, yet here he was, moving his head closer to yours. You waited in anticipation for him to make the final move, this was his time, and you wanted him to be ready.

 You closed your eyes as you felt his lips finally press against yours lightly, it sent your body into a blissful shock, it was like pressing against a fresh marshmallow. Your mouths began to move together, the longer your mouths stayed connected the more your bodies pressed against each other in desire. The satisfaction that coursed through you was enough to set the world aflame with joy. You had no idea how much your body wanted to feel his lips against yours, it was a hunger that curled your toes, that rumbled your stomach. Your hand went to his hair, and his hands wrapped around to rest on your back ad pull you deeper into his body. 

The entrance you gave him was immediate, you could feel his gratefulness as both of your tongues explored each other. Moans and pleasurable sighs echoed into the air, bouncing from wall to wall like a song. You knew you would need air eventually, but he was so addicting you wanted to hold on just a bit longer. He could sense your need and pulled away from you, earning a small groan of sadness. He laid his forehead against yours as your both were breathing rapidly, you watched his lips curl into a smile, and he placed another small kiss to your lips. 

“I have wanted to do that for so long.” He admitted in a whisper, making you smile. “You are always so patient with me, so understanding. Even back in the forties I never had a girlfriend that I appreciated as much as I appreciate you.”

You pulled from his forehead, your surprised face making him smile. “Girlfriend?” 

“Girlfriend.” 

 


End file.
